raining memories......

The  sky, at times, along with rain pours down memories too....

like it's pouring right now.... the sound of rain is tearing apart the silence of the serene evening... and it's definitely flooding memories in my mind........ I think of many things some forgotten ones and some not forgotten ones, some seem to be at quite a distance... either they look vague or it might be my vision which is disturbed, and then there are some which are crystal clear, I feel I can almost touch the moment...

here are somthing I'm thinking of....

a tiny li'l girl in yellow frock and shabby hair, kneeling there on the veranda of her grandma's house and trying to make a boat out of the freshly torn page of her notebook,a boat that would row in the small stream flowing in the backyard by the virtue of the heavy rain. so the boat is finally  ready, it's a li'l hunched like the childish handwriting of hers on the paper and she frowns on the idea that it won't flow now.... but bingoooo!!! the boat really does exceptionally well despite being jittery...:D

 ( an after thought- though the girl grew up but her handwriting remains the same.... hunched and childish...:( and paper boats have become a luxury...  )

a girl, fresh in her teens, looks out from the window of her classroom, simply forgetting that there exist a subject called mathematics,which is being taught right now, and she gets lost in the nostalgia of the rainy afternoon and wait.... did she just see that guy with specs, sitting there on the 2nd row of her class, standing out there in rain and smiling at her..... she looks towards the 2nd row.... no he is engrossed in maths...:) (cupid's first arrow gives the most silliest and cutest feeling to anyone in the world...that's a universal truth!!! )

a girl runs wildly behind a guy in one of the most busy streets of the city under the pouring sky, half praying that it be 'him', and half praying that he should not be 'him'.... and at last just to find that it was not him, and she silently thanks heaven for the rain coz she is so ashamed to show her tears to the world

( love and happiness obviously are not synonymous.... wonder what makes us take so long to understand such a simple thing *sigh* )

a bunch of carefree lasses get out on the field adjoining their hostel to pick up the stones that were just thrown down from the sky along with the rain.... and it starts pouring once again.... and these euphoric souls dance there in the rain, without caring about anything else in the world, without any audience,without any music...afterall not always one needs music to dance : p 

( the joys of friendship can come in any form , in any way, there simply isn't any measure or rule for it :) )

a girl and a boy sit together on the stairs and hear the sky pouring it's heart out, hardly it rains the way it is raining now, and perhaps both of them are thinking the same thing silently.... this is their first rainy season together in fact their first ever season together, and it's perhaps their last rain together too :)... they click a pic... both a li'l wet ... a li'l sad... yet smiling a lot .... there is nothing to say, nothing to ask for, nothing to promise, nothing to forget, nothing to look forward to... they still are laughing at each others silly jokes and talking about tomorrow which they know are separate ones for them.... at last they shake hand and manage a gudbye ...though eyes are a li'l wet and heart a li'l heavy... but, for some reason there is a warmth in the heart and a smile on the face...

 (sometimes it's better to smile and thank god for all that he has given, rather than to frown and ask him for what he has not given :) )

it's raining outside, it's the darkest hour of the night and those eyes still lay awake..... sleep just won't come... and then the memories capture the place of dreams..... she starts thinks of all the good times, and those not so good ones too, she recalls each of her mistakes, she fears her future and she wishes that life was a li'l less a mess than it is now.... the thunders are striking each and every chord of her heart and soul.... and all the painful ones... she looks up just to see if God is looking back at her ... and she cries..... she cries like never before........( why do we keep forgetting one simple rule of nature... the darkest hours are the one before the dawn )

Impossible?....no, I'm- possible :)

Why does being a second generation has to be such a headache... the pressure of legacy is sometimes too difficult to handle. Especially at times when in most of the cases the second generations fail to live up to the expectations and match the huge shadow of their antecedents. Though for the world, apparently, being a second genration or being one of the subsequent generations is such a lofty idea, most of the time there is this prejudice that everything comes easily, well orginized on a platter for those like us who belong to that particular group, but, only we know how difficult it becomes to do justice to that platter and how impossible it becomes to please the world (which of course isn't very receptive of new and is always reluctant to get the old overshadowed). So, I see in front of me an immensely difficult time in matching up the expectations and getting out of the shadow to create my own niche, but I'm determined and god willing I someday will. It might be difficult but it's not impossible. and as R H Schuller says... I'M-POSSIBLE :)

changed picture!

now it's a changed picture, coz I'm working on a changed ME...
but, it seems so damn difficult, the ME doesn't change easily, and I hate her for that, she keeps clinging to her old good self, while I want her to be really really mean and bad!
so, I got a gothic type of picture clicked, so that she would start feeling those horns and loose those faint rims (of course I don't claim her to be that saint to have a halo... but I do sometimes see those secretive faint rims around her trying to reach the perfection of halos)
but even this gothica type of pic isn't helping her....
oh...if I only could teach her.... THE ART OF BEING BAD !!!
and why do I need to be bad... oh I ve got hundreds and thousands of reasons....
- I want to be bad so that I would able to shout at ppl
- I want to be bad so that I can occasionally punch them too
- I want to be bad so that I can stop caring about this entire world
- I want to be bad so that I wouldnot miss those ppl who don't miss me :(
-

On A Woman's Mind....

What women want?


Has there been a tougher question than this one ? Especially for the the so called stronger gender? Very often I see this question popping out from men's mouth accompanied by all possible form of expressions that is known to to the man kind.

A frustrated "what do women want?", an awed "what women want?" , a loved "what women want?", a bewildered "what women want?" and sometimes a very genuine "what do women want?"

Too difficult a question, huh?

In fact, I too never had thought of it, till today when I asked my inner self, "what do I want?"

I had a doubt when I read this question for the first time, as to, will I have an answer, but surprisingly when I placed the question to myself, I was quite quick. Though, not very confident initially, but, when I analyzed my answer it came out to be so very true, at least for me!

So, what women want?

According to me, Love and Loyalty would sum up the entire answer.

Now, I know, at first look people would hardly agree to me, because apparently the needs may vary according to age, society, relationship and individual nature. Obviously you can't expect a thirteen old, a thirty year old and a sixty year old to have similar things on mind, or , a daughter, a wife or a mother to have similar expectations. But, that is what the beauty of these two words, love and loyalty is, that when seen in a broader sense these two things would be able to sum up everything. Well, I'm not counting materialistic things over here, for the simple reason that they are secondary, and when the primary needs are handled well secondaries either just follow them or become insignificant in their own ways.

Coming back to Love and Loyalty, how would these two words represent an entire array of needs and desires a woman's mind possesses, despite the differences of age, society and individuality?

Well, first lets see it relationship wise, love is all what a daughter, a sister,a friend, a lover, a wife and a mother a wants from her respective relations. Love in itself is such a vast emotion that it includes everything, be it understanding, care,respect, sympathy, friendship,or any other positive emotion, love can definitely act as a mother of all other positive emotions. So, the other person ,irrespective of whatever role he/she is playing in a woman's life, when loves a woman, he or she will obviously try his/her best to understand her, will have respect for her, will look after her needs and care for her in the best possible way. And the loyalty would make the person have faith in her and stand by her side through thick and thin, for better and for worse. These two things will give her everything, the love she can't do without, the security she needs, the freedom she desires for, and at the same time the rock strong support she silently wishes for. What else would a woman, or, as a matter of fact, any other living being on the earth would want?

Interestingly, these are the two things a woman wants from her own self too. A little bit of love for everything that her wonderful self is, and loyalty towards her own dreams that she carries in those starry eyes, in her soft heart, on that strong mind and within that accomplished soul.

this post is for the competition at the www.blogadda.com, sponsered by www.pringoo.com

crowncoffee
celebrating womanhood

moments & memories

it's a fond feeling to be woken up by the dreams of a place from past where you would like to be at, of people you would love to be with,and of a person you would like to be as....
 moments leave ....memories linger...